Monday, April 02, 2007

Spanking the kids...

My 12 y/o (13 on May 3rd) is giving attitude like a punk! He's getting constant In-School- Suspension (lately), has to be escorted to class because he's always tardy, and at home he's smarting off to 8.5 month-pregnant wife and muttering bad words in Spanish under his breath thinking we (parents) are too ignorant to know what he's saying (we live in Houston...most of our advertisements are in Spanish). So I explained to him, after much verbal admonitions to straighten up, I don't want to spank him because he's on the cusp of young manhood and so on, but after taking away his cool clothes (he's into this emo garbage) and shaving his head, he still persists. Therefore, I said hey, this is what's up: My job as a parent is to teach you right from wrong, to be a good member of society, etc. and I've done that. I can't tolerate your behaviour and I don't know what else to do, so here we are now. And then I gave him a couple of good swats on the booty with my belt. Here's my dilemna:

Why do I always feel guilty or bad afterwards? I didn't feel anger as I swatted him, just a grim this-is-what-I-have-to-do feeling. This is literally the 3rd time I've used the belt on him in his lifetime, so it's not abuse.

My 9 y/o (10 on April 17) rarely gets a tap. I don't recall ever choosing to use the belt on him; I just swat him with my hand (my Red Right Hand--Nick Cave and the B.S.). He's funny: when he knows he's getting it, he just resigns himself to it and gets it over with and then tries (falsely) to put on a face of hurt, which he can't fake very well so I usually turn my head and laugh because it's kind of cute; in contrast, my 12 y/o fights and cries big tears and begs for it not to be so...

My 5 y/o is the biggest sweetie in the world and has never, currently does not, nor ever will require a spanking.

So I wonder if this is how God felt when he melted Sodom and Gomorrah or drowned everybody in the flood? He loved his children, but they pushed the limits too far. Something had to be done but only one thing was left to do after repeated warnings and direction...

Hey, I just thought of something: is this an example of applying the Scriptures to one's life?

Another thing with the 12 y/o: seeing my hx of cycling through moods, I sometimes wonder (fear is a better word) if I passed on the madness...? Or, is he experiencing hormonal shifts with puberty and its oncoming onslaught? Or is it societally driven related to 7th grade?


Blogger elasticwaistbandlady said...

Papi spanks the chilluns only for lying, as he feels that truth is the entire foundation that you build your life upon.

My soon to be 12 year old is a little EMO wannabe but I won't allow her the black nail polish, eyeliner, and lipstick. Hair flopped over one eye? Check. Fall Out Boy and Panic! At The Disco on her ipod? Check. Morose interests and frequent bouts of being sullen? Check.

9:57 AM  
Anonymous Barb said...

I don't have any children so I can't give any advice from personal experience. It's hard to be a teen though. A lot of pressure all the way around.

6:31 PM  
Anonymous Barb said...

It's very hard to be the parent of a teen!

6:36 PM  
Anonymous Susan M said...

I think your comments are messed up on the Dethklok thread, I can't find the link to post one.

I <3 Deathklok.

9:18 AM  

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