Little Acorns

Be like the squirrel, girl, be like the squirrel...

Heather and I had her brother, his girlfriend, and her niece over for Christmas Day. We ate lots of food and took a walk around the 'hood. Right before we got home, there appeared a dead squirrel on the side of the road. All of the party had run ahead except Heather, Russel (her brother), and myself. We had our digital cameras and we were saying stuff like, "Shouldn't drink and drive, squirrel..." and stupid stuff like that. All of a sudden, I got the bright idea to prop the squirrel up against the curb and stick a cigarette butt in it's rigor-mortis jaws. Then, another bright idea popped into my head: what if we had a beer bottle around to put into it's paws? I looked into the edge of the woods and shazaam! a beer bottle appeared (I live next to the magical woods Christopher Robins walks his stuffed friends in). So, we were cracking up, laughing our heads off, Heather's about to pee on herself because she's big with child, and Russel and I are making crude comments! So much fun! Then, I looked up and saw across the street my friend Doug R., who happens to also be a counselor in our Ward's Elder's Quorum presidency. I said, "Hey, Doug, come check this out" because he was staring at the three of us laughing our booties off in the middle of the street. Also, his dad visiting from Utah was in the yard. So he starts to come over, but to our dismay he's bringing his 4 y/o son with him. I said, "Uh, you might not want to bring him over here". He looked over our shoulders, and his face fell. He turned around and walked his son back home. So, we left the scene, and told the rest of the family of our adventure, and decided to go on another walk and show them our friend the squirrel. But, it was gone...! What happened?

I think my friend might have gotten weirded out by the whole thing and decided the squirrel deserved a better fate of it's carcass than the crude mockery I inflicted upon it...? Maybe? Anyways, Merry Christmas!