Fellatio New Orleans

You go, Edwards! No one doubts your sincerity in shoveling that garbage! Politicians are dirt. Involvement in politics is kind of admitting you have no control over yourself and need guidance from other men; kind of like slavery...but then it's kind of a trap: there is a possibility of being enslaved if you're not involved...

So, John, what does it taste like?

It's kind of like the Gospel. Equate the Bill of Rights with the 4th Article of Faith: If you stray from either, you miss the point of the whole. That's when people start getting freaky! Freaky mormons or freaky politicians, they give a bad name to healthy forums.

I found some old and recent music: Pixies, Exploited, Infected Mushroom, and Broken Social Scene.

Heather and I went to another Ultrasound and yes, it's still a girl. I'm kind of hoping there was a mistake last month, because after three boys a girl is going to freak me out (and I know freaking out).

Don't give me no shit because...I've been tired (Pixies)

Little Acorns

Be like the squirrel, girl, be like the squirrel...

Heather and I had her brother, his girlfriend, and her niece over for Christmas Day. We ate lots of food and took a walk around the 'hood. Right before we got home, there appeared a dead squirrel on the side of the road. All of the party had run ahead except Heather, Russel (her brother), and myself. We had our digital cameras and we were saying stuff like, "Shouldn't drink and drive, squirrel..." and stupid stuff like that. All of a sudden, I got the bright idea to prop the squirrel up against the curb and stick a cigarette butt in it's rigor-mortis jaws. Then, another bright idea popped into my head: what if we had a beer bottle around to put into it's paws? I looked into the edge of the woods and shazaam! a beer bottle appeared (I live next to the magical woods Christopher Robins walks his stuffed friends in). So, we were cracking up, laughing our heads off, Heather's about to pee on herself because she's big with child, and Russel and I are making crude comments! So much fun! Then, I looked up and saw across the street my friend Doug R., who happens to also be a counselor in our Ward's Elder's Quorum presidency. I said, "Hey, Doug, come check this out" because he was staring at the three of us laughing our booties off in the middle of the street. Also, his dad visiting from Utah was in the yard. So he starts to come over, but to our dismay he's bringing his 4 y/o son with him. I said, "Uh, you might not want to bring him over here". He looked over our shoulders, and his face fell. He turned around and walked his son back home. So, we left the scene, and told the rest of the family of our adventure, and decided to go on another walk and show them our friend the squirrel. But, it was gone...! What happened?

I think my friend might have gotten weirded out by the whole thing and decided the squirrel deserved a better fate of it's carcass than the crude mockery I inflicted upon it...? Maybe? Anyways, Merry Christmas!

Mis-Spaced

I finally did myspace with the help of my son Goobers.

myspace.com/psychicheads

If you have any ideas on how to spruce it up with different backgrounds, music, etc. let me know. I find the idead of myspace as narcissistic, but I have so many friends out there I figured why not.

LDS

I'm back! I'm playing Church hymns on Itunes (interspersed with Alien Sex Fiend, Skinny Puppy, etc.)and desiring to live simply and righteously. Wow, the roller-coaster is great! I have no desires for reeb or anything of that nature. I feel like actually talking with people and interacting in Church. But, I'm still moving forward guardedly. Forward, Guardedly. That could be a title for something nice...

I bought myself a dog for Christmas. A miniature Dachsund. We had it wormed and shot already.

LSD

Lonely Saturn Destination. I stopped drinking, again. It's weird; one day I'm tragic, burned out, mentally ill, then the next I'm back to my 'good' Mormon self like I never even tripped up. Strange...but I still feel minor waves of black every now and then. It's like an earthquake with all the little aftershocks. So now I'm back to feeling like I'm normal and it's all in my head and I had a moment of weakness as opposed to something darker and I don't really need 'help'...

I went to a friend's house, whom I also home-teach, and they sang Christmas carols and had good food to eat and then afterwards we watched the 1st Presidency message. What a night! It was good and strange to see there are actually families like that. I felt like I was on the outside looking in...surreal.

My battery died and a complete stranger gave me a ride home way out of his way, and it made him late for work.

There are people with good hearts; it's strange...

I was thinking of the power struggles going on around the world, and I wonder if maybe I should let those struggles go on without worrying about it...? Thinking of that, I then thought about suicide bombers and maybe understood their reasoning about this is not their world so why not kill themselves and others, and I wonder if maybe I was actually thinking of being a holy apathy-bomber...? I would make 'good' choices but let the world sink in it's own defecation (I'm trying not to cuss but it's so fucking hard...hahahaha) because of the call of 'being in the world but not of it' or something like that.

Another struggle on the Mormon front: I read a good book called "My Sister's Keeper" which was going to be a reading group book for some of the sisters in my ward here in Kingwood but someone shot it down because of the 'f-word'. So, here is the question, and I could care less either way: the story is powerful. I felt no influence to cuss, fart, or murder after reading it. I think personally the story made a lot of good points, esp. since I work in the med. field. Would it be inappropriate to read it because of the language? I guess you have to read it to have any kind of opinion...Oh yeah, why doesn't the Elder's quorum have a monthly reading club? And would any of you online strangers be interested in starting a blogging reading club?

I'm thinking of Chloe for a name...

Reason # 5,042 to Nuke the crap out of them...

Religion of peace.

There's a freak in the cellar...

And I'm going to let him in...

We're driving to work, which is a 45 minute drive, so I have time to jam, and we're listening to Rembrandt Pussyhorse, and my four year old says Gibby Haynes sounds like Spongebob. How cool is that?

Anyways...I'm sick of the middle east. Screw the middle east. Let them wallow in their own mire. I hate all of the anti-Americans and all of their hypocrisy. Feminism, except when Islam deigns to commit female circumcision...equal rights except for Christians...the world is sucking down stupid pills right now. So I was right, all along, reading Mad magazine...

It is cool and scary at the same time to have a girl...I wonder if she will motivate me to straighten up and save my soul...Nearer my God to thee, for further I could not be...I've been imbibing on dark waters so forgive my ramblings...

The only thing I'm sure of at this point is I love my family. I don't like Church. I love the Gospel. Dark times...